Working Through Fear: Ending Success Roadblocks
Some people fear failure, and others fear success. That might seem nuts to fear success, but success brings responsibility, and some people are afraid of that too. If you really want to be more successful it’s time to work through your fear.
Signs of Fear of Success
If you fear success, there is a chance that you actively avoid success. You don’t make goals, remember deadlines, or aren’t self-motivated, or often second-guess yourself. Making decisions is difficult for someone who is acting in fear.
In fact, fear of success is so intense in some people that it seems disaster strikes them anytime they’re getting ready to taste success. They get sick, use drugs, and actively sabotage themselves. Some people just never make decisions and don’t even realize they’re practicing sabotage.
To deal with fear, you can work through it by doing the following:
The more success you experience, the less fear you’re going to have. Challenge yourself and learn as much as you can so that you can overcome any fear that is holding you back.
7 Ways to Develop a Wealthy Mindset
When studying people, one thing that becomes clear is that if you were born into a middle or lower-middle-class family that had struggles making ends meet you will have a far different mindset, as compared to wealthier counterparts.
People can have different mindsets even if they had the same amount of money, but if the perception was that they had means, they acted differently than people who did not think they had means.
Define What Wealth Means to You
It’s crucial for you to define what this means for you. How much money do you need to earn to feel wealthy or to be able to make the kinds of choices that will lead to more wealth for you?
Choose a real number. Yes, wealth can be in non-monetary terms, but the truth is, you often need money to live a happy life. Money doesn’t make you happy, but money can make a happy life easier.
Set Clear Monetary Goals
Once you have set the wealth number, and lifestyle ideas for yourself, it’s also essential to use that information to set clear monetary goals. You may not be close to those goals, but when you spell out what you want your life to look like, it’s going to be a lot easier to get there. Think of it as using GPS to plan a cross country trip.
Develop an Action Plan
You can use your business plan to help you design your business so that it meets your income requirements. When you know exactly what you need to do today to produce the income you need tomorrow, you’re going to be much more successful in your endeavors.
Surround Yourself with Likeminded People
You may need to find new friends and colleagues to surround yourself with if you are often getting pushback from your friends, family, and coworkers. Join local groups, find international groups, locate a life and business coach who can encourage and help you realize your goals by giving you some accountability.
Implement Your Plan
You can tell the universe all day long that you want $1,000,000 dollars, but if you aren’t doing something to generate those funds it’s not going to happen magically. You have to create a plan and start taking the actions needed to achieve your goals within the various areas.
Measure, Track, and Adjust Your Plan
You can only be sure you’re heading in the right direction if you check your numbers and track the data. For example, if you said you needed to earn 100 dollars a day to reach your goal for September, did you reach that goal, and if so, can you duplicate it?
Once you check your numbers, if you find that things aren’t working as planned you can adjust. If you find that things are working better than you thought you can do more of it.
How to Recover from Setbacks
Congratulations. You tried but you didn’t achieve your ultimate goal. Guess what? It’s okay. In fact, it’s impressive. You got out there and did a lot of things outside of your comfort zone. Your bravery and dedication are truly enough to get through the fact that you had a setback.
The truth is, if you work hard in life and push through, overcome challenges, solve problems, and learn new things, you’re going to have major setbacks sometimes. That’s the way life works. It’s so much better, though, to try and fail than to never try at all.
Accept the Situation
The worst thing you can do when things don’t work out is to pretend it did not happen. People fail to achieve their goals every day. It is not the end of the world. Even if the failure resulted in severe consequences the only thing you can do now is accept what happened and try again, at some point.
Once you realize you failed now, you want to take responsibility for the failure. You can only be responsible for things you had direct control over so make sure you’re being fair to yourself and realistic.
Fix What You Can
Once you realize a mistake was made, and something failed, you’ll need to fix whatever you can. That may mean something like saying sorry, financial compensation, or another solution based on who was affected.
Forgive yourself if you want others to forgive you too. Also forgive anyone who may blame themselves. Tell people that you’re sorry for your part, describing your role, and then forgive everyone, including yourself.
Debrief and Learn
The best way to figure things out when things go wrong is to go through the steps you took that contributed to the problem. This is what happens during any accident. Everyone goes over the mistakes together so that they can avoid them in the future, rather than point fingers and place blame.
Once you study the situation and you have more information about how to make things work like you wanted, let it go and move on. For example, if you realize the reason you didn’t get paid for the work you did is because you did not stick to your onboarding plan or make them sign a contract. You now know what to do, if you aren’t paid next time, that the problem is elsewhere and not with you again.
Recovering from setbacks and a failure to meet your goal is as simple as accepting the failure, making restitution to anyone that needs it, identifying issues that caused the failure, and making improved strategies based on the new information you learn.
Success Mindset for Achieving Your Goals in Life
The world is made up of three kinds of people. Those who are successful, those who are not yet successful and those who will never be successful. You can see this simply by looking at people who try and try and just never seem to make it even though it’s clear that they possess the knowledge they need.
So why are there people in this world who dream big and have hopes for a successful future, but it all comes to nothing? The answer is that their mindset held them back just like the mindset of the successful propelled them to greater heights and the achievements of their dreams. If you want to make it in anything, you must have a success mindset.
Why a Successful Mindset Makes Your Goals Achievable
Having a success mindset is an important tool because what you think is in control of what you’ll do. If you think you can’t, you won’t. If you think you’re a failure, you are. If you think dreams come true for other people and not for you, then you’re right.
You’re creating your own version of mental roadblocks that then lead to physical roadblocks because you develop the mindset of “Why bother to try when you’re only going to end up failing?”
You think this way because you haven’t yet realized the power of mindset. It can guide or affect everything you do in your personal or professional life. The reason that it has this power is because you are the fuel that feeds into the belief.
Then you will act according to your mindset. You’ll act like a failure or you’ll act like a winner. You’ll act defeated or you’ll act triumphant. You might not have the same education as the next person.
You might not have the same level of talent. You might not have a lot of money. You might not have the same outgoing personality. But that doesn’t mean that your chances of success are any lower, because your mindset will determine that, not your station in life.
If you don’t believe that, do a quick search on people who became millionaires or who build a successful business from nothing. Your circumstances aren’t the chains that hold you back.
Your mindset is. But it doesn’t have to be. Only you can give it that authority. Once you step up and take control of your mindset, your days feeling like and acting like a failure are over.
Developing a success mindset leads to a change in how you see yourself. You’ll stop having a negative attitude about who you are and what you’re capable of. You’ll stop the thought track in your mind that tells you that you can’t succeed, that you don’t have what it takes.
Stopping that track then boosts your self-esteem. Whatever negative thought or belief that you allow to grow within your mind will grow and flourish like weeds choking out even the tiniest speck of good that you might believe about yourself.
When you develop a success mindset, it allows you to overcome self-criticism. This enables how you view everything to change. It changes your perspective, your ideas, bolsters your goals and gives new and fresh meaning to what you want to achieve.
How do you know if you have a success mindset? You view any failures as an opportunity to learn and grow rather than as stopping points. Every success that you want is doable by having a success mindset.
When you have that, your perspective shifts. You see obstacles as challenges. You believe you can overcome whatever obstacle is thrown at you. When you view problems, you might not automatically know the answer to them, but you believe that you’ll get the answer.
The vision that you have for your life shifts when you have a success mindset. It creates a determination within you that propels you forward and allows you to succeed regardless of the effort it takes.
You don’t quit until your goals are accomplished. With a success mindset, you don’t see circumstances that hold you back. You see chances to grow. You develop a strong can do attitude that allows you try where previously you might have allowed circumstances to keep you stuck at the starting line.
You have to remember that a success mindset envisions triumph, which improves your ability to reach the goals that you set for yourself. Think of your mindset as a gate that either opens for opportunities or closes to them.
Change Hopeless Negativity to an Optimistic Success Mindset
One of the reasons that people develop a sense of hopeless negativity is because they view their life goals, their relationships, their dreams and their needs in light of what should have been instead of what is.
They feel a sense of disappointment that things haven’t worked out the way that they want, so they begin to close ranks around possibilities. People with hopeless negativity fail to see life as it can be and only focus on the bad or what’s prevented them from succeeding.
People who think this way don’t see their situation as ever improving. Their belief is that everything is bad. They live day to day expecting the worst to happen. It usually does because mindset leads to behaviors or habits that create the existence they believe.
So they end up not trying and they settle for the kind of life they don’t want, failing to see that the one they do want is only a mindset change away. Changing your hopeless negativity to an optimistic success mindset isn’t difficult.
It just takes some practice. Learn to view every situation though a positive lens. You can do this by seeking the positive in the situation, in the person or in your thoughts. What happens when you do this is it shifts your mindset away from what’s not good and puts it on what is.
Take the time every single day to reflect on the good that you experienced. If you look for the positive, you will find it regardless of whatever is going on - regardless of what did or didn’t happen.
You have to stop dwelling on the immediate and keep your view settled on the outcome. Every positive journey will have negative parts to it. If you stay focused on the negative, you can miss the bigger picture.
Your mindset can get so clouded over by the negative that you completely miss the good things that are waiting for you to take hold and move you ahead toward your success.
You can change hopeless negativity, but not holding onto those thoughts or attitudes. These are things that you usually dwell on. And wherever your attention is, your mindset follows.
For example, if you continually dwell on all that needs repairing in your home, you’ll start to dislike where you live. You’ll feel miserable and start wishing you could move. Then you’ll start thinking about how you can’t afford to move and you’ll feel trapped.
So the one negative thought mushrooms and becomes this huge thing that makes you feel hopeless. Then you feel helpless to change your situation - all because your mind says there’s nothing you can do.
But if you look at the repairs in your home as an opportunity to fix it up the way you want it to be, or to make improvements that you like better, you’ll notice that your attitude has changed about it.
The attitude changed because the mindset did. Examine any negative or hopeless thought that comes into your mind. Take charge of it and ask yourself what opportunities are hidden in the situation.
Then find them and focus on those instead. Make it a habit to seek the positive and let it be how you start and end your day. Begin your day by thinking a positive thought. It can be something about it being a beautiful day or something like you get to have your favorite cup of coffee.
End your day the same way. Start a habit of writing down at least 3 good things that happened to you that day, that you learned, that you accomplished. This habit is what teaches you to notice what’s good.
When you look for the positive, it makes you feel better and it changes your perspective from one that life is happening to – to something that you’re in control of. You discover that you make your own happiness and that it’s not determined by external haves or have nots.
You must keep in mind that whichever mindset you feed is the one that grows. If you feed the negative mindset, it blooms into something that can easily overwhelm the good. If you feed the good mindset, it blooms and gains control rather than the negative side.
Becoming Sure of Your Success Mindset Until You Follow Through
It’s one thing to talk about a success mindset. Another to live it. You might want a success mindset but not be sure about your ability to achieve it or unsure if you can carry on until you do follow through and reach your goals.
Your environment can often determine your ability to follow through. The rule of thumb is always negative in, negative out. Spend enough time in a negative environment and you’ll end up affected.
If all the people you have in your circle practice a negative mindset and they seem to see the problems instead of the hope in even trying, before long, you’ll be spouting the same words they’re speaking.
You’ll see gloom and doom. You’ll see all the reasons why you can’t accomplish your dreams. You’ll think about how success is for others, not you. You’ll look at their lives and see how they too, are just like you.
They didn’t succeed, so what makes you think you can? Everyone has their own personality. They’re the sum parts of the way they were raised, the friends they have, the habits they perform.
But what carries the a lot of weight in anyone’s life are the people that you hang with. These are the people that you look to for advice. They’re the ones that you complain to on the phone.
They’re the ones that influence your decisions. If your environment is made up of negative influences, it has to change in order for you to succeed. You can become sure of your success mindset by reframing what you’re up against.
You might feel that there’s no way you can succeed. So reframe that what you’re up against isn’t something insurmountable. Instead, it’s something that’s going to offer you a learning experience.
What this does is take you out of your comfort zone and allow you to push beyond self-imposed mindset limitations. You’ll be able to see the accomplishments rather than the failures.
You must push past the limits that you’ve set for yourself in the past. As you stretch your mindset, it lets go of the mental blocks that hold your success hostage. It frees you up to take risks, to step beyond what you thought you were capable of.
Instead of thinking that there’s no way you can succeed, you’ll begin to view yourself as someone who’s in control of his success. You follow through by welcoming mistakes as an opportunity to learn and rise above the issues.
When you practice a success mindset, it lets you choose to move. It also lets you acknowledge that you need to learn with grace rather than allowing it to be the thing that holds you back.
You become sure of your success mindset when you change your thought processes. When you stop going through life saying, “I can’t” or “I might fail” and instead saying, “Good things are going to happen for me,” then by your actions, you make that positive outcome a reality.
Action Steps You Can Take to Develop a Success Mindset
Practice positive affirmations. Doing this will help you realize that you’re good enough and that what you need to succeed, you already possess. Positive affirmations can help you see yourself as worthy and strong as well as capable.
These affirmations can help you break free from a negative mindset that leads to self sabotaging behavior such as not even trying to go after success. Your brain reacts to repeated positive affirmations and accepts them as truth.
When you speak them, use the present tense. Choose affirmations such as, “I am successful and talented. I recognize my abilities and other people recognize my abilities.”
Your brain then begins to create positive thoughts based on that affirmation. Your body and your attitude then follow along. Your action steps will be based in the belief that you can achieve your goals.
Follow success stories. Find the stories that motivate and inspire you. Watch documentaries of people that have similar goals that you also want to reach. Study what they did and how they overcame obstacles.
Watching other successful people in action fills you with a can-do attitude. You start thinking that if that person can do it, then so can you. Create a vision board. When you create a board that uses a selection of images representing what your success is, it creates an image of what can be.
The board is a tangible view of what you want to achieve. When you have a vision board, you use the power of visualization to prompt a success mindset. The board sinks into your subconscious mind and lets you see things you may not have realized before.
A vision board acts as a reminder that success is yours. Having one can help you choose action when fear creeps in. It can also help you remember to believe in yourself and to keep your brain focused on the positive, which is the outcome of your goals.
The board should be a visual representation of your success story unfolding. Practice the law of attraction. Know what it is that you want to attract to your life. Believe that you have it in you to make all your dreams come true.
Overcome the Number One Fear
The fear is the biggest barrier in your success.
You might have skills, capabilities to reach there but your fear can be the only reason to stop you from going after what you truly desire. They can give rise to negative emotions like your chances of success are very low that you don’t even try.
Fears are complex and cunning, they can be deep-seated and they are often sub conscious, which means the state of being unaware of what holding you back.
Certain practical exercises to help you get beyond it so you can pursue and achieve your goals.
Understand your triggers.
Is there is something obvious that you know you have fear of? Like the sight of a snake on a trail or of darkness? Figure out everything that triggers your fear and try to understand it because more you know and try to understand better are chances to face it.
Question the power the fear holds over you
Does your fear holds you back from keep moving and growing. Is it the reason that you don’t go to family functions or you won’t get on a plane? If anything like this happens to you then figure out what power your fear have over your mind and behavior. Learn to fight from your fears as you hold the biggest power in you, don’t think too much. Learn to face the situations as you are not alone, many people have several fears but if you learn to conquer over them, then you might become the motivation for others.
Identify false beliefs
Many fears are based in false beliefs or catastrophic thinking. It may be based on your ancestors or false society beliefs. Like when you see a spider a sudden thought came that spider may harm you and then you will die. Identify these patterns and starts questioning them. Do some online research and understand the difference in actual and perceived risk. Start re- structuring your thoughts to not engage in catastrophic thinking.
Learn relaxation techniques. When your body experiences fear, lots of triggers ready your body for a “fight-or-flight” action response. Learn to override this response by counteracting with relaxation techniques. Relaxation tells your body that there is no danger and that you are safe. Relaxation can also help you cope with other stress and anxiety in your life.
Try deep breathing exercises.
Focus on your breath, and start counting each breath: four seconds inhale, then four seconds exhale. Once this is comfortable, elongate your breath to six seconds.
Learn relaxation techniques. One way to do this is to clench all the muscles in your body for three seconds, then relax them. Do this two or three times to melt stress throughout your body. Relaxation will tell your body that there is no danger and help you to cope with stress and anxiety in your life.
Use your senses
One of the most reliable way to relieve anxiety is be engaging your one or more senses—sight, sound, taste, smell, touch—or through movement. But still it may work for you or may be not but do some experimenting to discover what works best for you.
Challenge negative thoughts about your phobia
When you have a phobia, you tend to overestimate the situations and start overthinking like how bad it would be if you are exposed to it or underestimate your ability to cope. These negative thoughts that fuel your phobias are usually negative and unrealistic. By writing your negative thoughts when confronted by phobia, you can begin to challenge these unhelpful ways of thinking.
Start seeing fear as an opportunity
Fear can also be a tool to help us identify problems and solve them effectively. It’s a red flag that warns us when something needs attention.
When you feel fear of something unfamiliar, take it as a sign that you need to get to know a person or situation better. If you feel a flash of fear then its an opportunity to make a plan of action to be prepared, it can be rehearsing a play or practicing a speech.
Overcoming the fear and anxiety will give you the 'spare capacity' in life to focus on what you really want to be and do. Though it takes efforts and might be little time but imagine the rewards you will be getting afterwards.
Success is Attitude too
If you want to achieve your greatest potential in your life then one of the most important step is to monitor your attitude and its impact on your performance, your relationships and everyone around you. It’s difficult to be happy and content professionally (not to mention personally) if you’re constantly overworked and stressed out. But there’s an easy way to become both happier and more successful quickly. It’s as simple as this: change your attitude.
Here are some of the ways that the right attitude can make you more successful:
Self-Motivation through Discovering Your Motives
Discover what motivates you in a positive way to take action to change your life. Basic motives include love, self-preservation, anger, financial gain and fear. Self-motivation requires enthusiasm, a positive outlook towards life, a positive physiology and a belief in yourself and your God-given potential.
The Power of Visualization
Studies have shown that peak performers use affirmations and visualizations either consciously or subconsciously to enhance and focus on their skills. Nelson Mandela has written extensively on how visualization helped him maintain a positive attitude while being imprisoned for 27 years. “I thought continually of the day when I would walk free. I fantasized about what I would like to do,” he wrote in his autobiography. Visualization works well to improve attitude.
Exercising Will Help Keep You Motivated
One of the best ways to move to a more positive and motivated frame of mind is to exercise. A regular exercise routine can provide relatively quick positive feedback in the form of not only losing weight or muscle development but brings a sense of doing something positive for yourself.
Create positive impressions.
It is no secret that life seems to reward us most when we approach the world with a positive attitude. You never get a second chance to make a first impression. It probably comes as no surprise, but when you have a good attitude, you’re more likely to present yourself to others in a positive light.
Good impressions can lead to many potential benefits. Employers may be more likely to choose you as a new hire. Co-workers, colleagues, and potential partners will be more inclined to work with you.
A good attitude creates positive first impressions, which are the gateway to developing deeper personal and professional connections. Ultimately, this can create in-roads in business, so that you can forge positive, lasting relationships with employers, colleagues, and potential partners.
Remember: when opportunity knocks, there’s someone doing the knocking. You want people to think of you when opportunities arise, and your connections are the key to making this happen.
Gain more confidence.
If you want to be more confident then there are variety of things that can help you from visualization to improving your posture to dressing nicely for success. However, none of these exercises will be very effective without the right attitude.
When you have a good attitude then you likely to put efforts for self-improvement exercises and continue getting stronger. In short, a positive outlook will make it possible to keep getting better, and this positive progress can boost your confidence big time in the long term.
You’ll be happier.
By adopting the right attitude, you stand to gain in so many ways, but perhaps the most profound is that it will make you feel happier. When you feel happier, things seem far more achievable in life. Day in and day out, they can have a profound effect on your career -- and life.
So, consider shifting to an attitude of gratitude and apply it to your work moving forward. You have everything to gain!
Qualities of a winner
In the era of fierce competition when everyone wants to know the secret formula of success- either individually or in team or as an organization. What is the real secret? Why some people reach at the top, be it in business, sport, or entertainment?
What are the qualities that separate such winners from others? These are-
This means knowing what you want to achieve. This is a critical quality of a winner. When Federer started playing tennis he had one goal and that was to win six grand slams just like his childhood heroes Stefan Edberg and Boris Becker respectively. This is not a bad goal and he has surpassed that goal by nearly 3 times. The key is he was absolutely clear on what he wanted to achieve. The only way to be self- directed is to set goals for every area of your life including personal, career, family and financial. Once you ignite the flames of your potential you can blast through any setbacks.
Self-discipline is the most important one because of his only you can follow other disciplines. The greatest people of the world practiced it. You can develop it too if you have a burning desire inside you to achieve something with your life. You cannot build it if you are unclear of the blueprint of what you want your future to look like.
You are the boss of your career. In the last you are the winner or you are the loser and it’s your choice what you want to be. You cannot blame any situation or person for it. Think like you are running a company with one employee yourself and to keep going you need to take its responsibility, upgrade your skills, build your brand (there are more avenues than ever to achieve this), and network relentlessly. You also should develop the habit of asking for what you want. Only if you ask you can get.
Winners know themselves and are honest with themselves. They figure out the balance between training harder and taking some time to recover. They regularly push themselves to the limit but also allow themselves to recover appropriately.
Winners aim and aspire for the stars. They hold a vision for themselves and create stretching goals. Having the drive, motivation and dedication to continuously focus take them to achieve their ambition and reach their destination.
Taking full advantage of every opportunity that comes on your way must be a priority if you want to be a winner. You don’t have fewer opportunities, only the way to look at them differs from person to person. The Winners see an opportunity and grasp it with both hands and make full use of the situation or task. The winners don’t take opportunities for granted and are grateful for the opportunities that have come about, seeking to make the most of their situation.
Ego can be a destructive thing. If you are suffering from being too egoistic then you are in battle with yourself. It’s not that you should not be proud of your achievements or there is any harm in flaunting them but one should never forget humility. As Good things happen to good people. Gracious humility leads that path.
Enthusiasm and Passion
Nothing kills momentum and creativity faster than a lackluster spirit. A sour attitude is deadly to just about anything it touches. If we are fortunate enough to have a passion for what we do, it’s a great thing. Many people are not that lucky. So where do we find the energy and enthusiasm to do our work well? We find it in the things that really matter. The smiles and laughter of our children. The support and gratitude of our loved ones for the things we do. Enthusiasm is a powerful tool. It will always reward in increased production, positive leadership, and the building of the desired reputation that opens doors.
Don’t waste time
Time never waits for anyone. The winners know how to make out of every minute; they understand that some things and some people only slow them down on their journey of success. It is always better to eliminate distractions so that you can focus on priorities.
Learn to develop such qualities to be a winner. However this does not means that you will always experience victory, sometimes failures will also come your way but remember you must learn from them and nothing can stop you. Once you fall, make sure you come back much stronger than before.