There is a secret to getting more what you want out of life, and it is no surprise that it starts with the way you communicate. People are either aggressive, giving demands, while some are too quiet and passive, ultimately letting others walk all over them.
However, the secret to good communication and success in life is to be more assertive. Being assertive is the ability to successfully communicate your needs, wishes, thoughts, or feelings without disrespecting others and, in turn, getting more of what you want out of life. Use the suggestions below to help you be more assertive in life.
Practice and Take Chances
Put yourself out there more and take chances to be more assertive. If you sit back and expect things to happen, chances are you won’t change. Take on more responsibilities at your job or within the household, attend more local events or anything you can to get you out of your comfort zone.
Mind Your Manners
Being assertive doesn’t mean you should be rude or disrespectful. It includes understanding how conversations flow and when is the most appropriate time to speak up. Learn about proper communication techniques to improve your conversations, making them more effective and productive.
Don’t allow negative energy or thoughts to manifest in your interactions with others. Even if the conversation you need to have is difficult, always keep negative thoughts in control. Find the positive outcome of the situation and make sure your body langue, tone of voice, and speed match.
Always Expect Positive and Negative Reactions from Others
Don’t assume a conversation or reaction from others is always going to be your way. You can’t control them or even teach them to communicate “properly.” Expect any outcome to happen and be mindful of yourself and the situation in each given moment. This way, you are more prepared to make the right reaction.
If you don’t expect others to have a negative response towards you, you might not be prepared for the reaction you will take, ultimately leading to an aggressive response. Assertive behavior includes standing your ground and being respectful towards other people's feelings, thoughts, and opinions when you do.
Practice Empathy and Compassion
Remember, being more assertive is a balancing act between aggressive and passive behaviors. Therefore, you need to be empathetic and compassionate to those around you. This way, you can learn to understand everyone's perspective and get what you need easier and more appropriately. If you assume everyone is like you, you will be viewed as aggressive or egotistic, for example.
Take Time to Understand Others
The more you understand those around you, the better you can effectively communicate your needs or wishes respectfully. Ask challenging questions so you can be on the same page faster.
Remember always to stand your ground respectfully, be true to yourself, and keep practicing. No one is perfect, and that is the beauty of it. If you fail, at least you are trying.